I need to get involved in here! DX

Hello guyses! So I am part of the co-founders now and I feel like I haven't even touched this group. I AM SORRY! DON'T HIT ME! PLEASE. So, I shall introduce myself as well as tell you guys a little story that I think you will appreciate.

Call me Fox Ai. I prefer masculine pronouns. I am genderfluid, pansexual and polyamorous. Anyways...let's get to what really matters.

This week is a thing at my school called Writer's Week. It is a week long event where numerous authors, songwriters and performers basically showcase their work as well as host workshops with students. Alongside them, they have student presenters from our school. This is the 2nd year it is running so I decided, why not submit something? So one night, I sat down and began to write. I was going to do something on depression. But I am trying to put my depression behind me. So I started with something that was in the back of my mind. Being Pansexual. I don't know if it is just me, but I have experienced rather cruel LGBTQ members who claim that pansexuality doesn't exist and that it is merely a fancy word for bisexual. This really upset me (besides the saying "so you like cookware?") I wrote. I wrote and I wrote. I submitted it and hoped for the best.

A few days later, in choir, a teacher comes in and asks for me. He explains to me that my poem was amazing and that there were no notes or things that needed changing. He said it was perfect. He asked if I was still interested. I said yes. Well a week later, I get an email about having a rehearsal for presenters and basically to get stage performance critique. I said I was available. Then he said that my english teacher wanted to ask me something. Well, she asks me if I want to perform it a third time for a fundraiser banquet type of thing. She told me she read it and loved it. It seems a lot of the english teachers love it. I was surprised.

Now down to the nit and grit. I perform my poem Wednesday, two times and then thursday night. People who do not have classes that hour or have an english class will be able to come see. I am the opener for a more famous author. Basically guys, I am coming out to everyone at school. Everyone who comes and sees me that day. This is a huge deal guys. Like...you have no idea.

You see, for years I have wanted to kill myself. It may seem selfish the reason but it was because I felt I didn't contribute to the world and that I merely was a waste. Up until this year actually. And for once, I never felt more...more like I had a meaning. This one english teacher told me that she didn't believe I only performed a poem once prior. She told me that performance poems could be my thing. My thing. Something I can do. Something unique to me. Selfish? If you want to say that but for once I don't feel suicidal. I feel...I feel like I made it. I have tears right now because I am overwhelmed. I made it guys. And why? So I could boldy proclaim my sexuality. So I could inform people who even when you think you are accepted, you don't see it all. Sorry if this is a lot, but I just had to share. I have the poem below:

Lemme tell you a little something about some set of letters.
A set of colors.
That
stand for all us
outcasts
nobodies
goth
emo
“scenesters” if those are still around
Jocks
Preps
Gays
Lesbians
Transgenders
but i'm not tryna label anyone
so lets go back to this alphabet.
LGBTQ. LGBTQ.
L. G. B. T. Q.
RedOrangeYellowGreenBlue…
Purple…
Yet…
Where do I fit in?
P. That stands for me.
LGBTQ yet no P? But that P...well like i said, it stands for who i am. It stands for me.
P stands for Pansexual. Something I know well.
Love is Love.
Hearts not Parts.
A master of the “heart arts” not to toot my own horn.
Not loving by a man’s muscle. A girl’s waist. A man’s face or a ladies taste.
Not loving by a ladies hustle. A man’s cry. A ladies sigh or a man’s ability to tie a tie. because let’s be honest boys. That’s a pain.
Not caring about what they wear. Or how they do their hair. Or whether or not they care
about getting jacked.
Or toned.
Or ripped.
Or whatever it is you people like to do to keep your figure uptight and chipped.
Not caring about them looking like a man. Or them looking like a woman. Or them wanted to be called Jan when they were born an Ian.
Not looking at their outside and judging.
But looking on their inside.
Their heart.
Their center. Their core.
The thing most people fail to see.
The thing I want much much more.
Not whether or not they can lift 164. Impressive, but not my thing.
Pansexual by definition means: not limited or inhibited in sexual choice with regard to gender or activity.
And what does this mean to you and me?
Well this is me.
I love women. I love men. I love women who dress like men. I love men who dress like women. I love women who are also men. And men who are also women. I love people who are neither. And people who are both.
Yet.
In this “LGBTQWeallloveeachotherandaccept
community….” there is no P.
Because according to them.
I don’t exist.
Yet here I am.
Telling you my story.
Telling you who I am.
100 percent
all natural scent
Not a single bone bent
No artificial preservatives
No artificial dyes
no dye red 42
no dye blue 54
No dye yellow 78
No mambo no 5
Just me.
The P.
P for Pansexual.